5 Days Post-Hysterectomy
My adenomyosis journey
December 16th arrived so quickly. It felt like forever at first. The pain I felt beforehand was a confirmation that I wanted/needed the surgery. It affected me in weird ways. My arm hurt, my wrists were weak, I could not bend my right knee. I barely slept because my entire body hurt.
Days before surgery.. I just could not get comfortable.
I was not nervous on surgery day, it was only anticipation to get it over with. My parents could not come into the surgical unit with me, due to covid. When my name was called I hugged them, my step-dad told me to have fun, and I followed a nurse to the back. The nurses knew I had anxiety, but when they asked me if I needed anything I said I was good. I really was OK not taking anything, and waiting until anesthesia. Gathering my history, a nurse said I have the health history of an older person. Yes, I am aware. Before surgery I was very dehydrated, and they drew my blood twice because some of my levels were a bit off and they wanted to make sure it was not a fluke. I was not too surprised. I had been so unwell.
The nurses and even the anesthesiologists were very kind and it was a small hospital so I did not feel overwhelmed. Waiting for the IV, I dug into the muscles in my thighs and hoped they would no longer hurt when I woke up.
Before I knew it my surgeon had arrived, they were getting me ready, and I was wheeled into the operating room. They warned me, “it’s very bright and very cold.” It was, but at that point I had some medicine to relax me. I think the last thing I remember was them telling me they were going to give me some oxygen. I think I recall a mask on my face and I think I was knocked out within seconds.
When it was over I woke up slowly, and it was hard to stay awake. I noticed my legs no longer hurt, and I rated my pain a 3. It did not take much longer before I realized I lied, it was definitely not a 3. I asked for more pain medication and it helped tremendously. I had 3 glued incisions on my abdomen, in addition to 1 inside my belly button. I also had stitches inside to replace my cervix- which I of course won’t be able to see. In the recovery room I was doing well, so I only had to stay for a few more hours. I had a catheter in and after they took it out they wanted to make sure I could pee on my own. A nurse helped me hobble to the bathroom and TMI, I just sat there for a while with zero idea how to go. My stomach was swollen. Because they removed my cervix, and I had zero connection to that part of my body or how to relax those muscles. All I could see in the toilet was blood, and a mini trail of blood I had left walking to the toilet. I stood at the sink crying, knowing I would not be able to see my parents or get discharged until I was able to pee. I also was admittedly scared that even peeing hurt. The nurse waiting outside the door knocked to check on me, and opened the door to me standing at the sink in tears. “I couldn’t go, I said.” She looked over at the blood in the toilet. “I’m so sorry” I said. That is SO me! I WOULD apologize. She assured me it was okay and helped me walk back to my bed. I continued to cry while lying there, and I could hear everything in the hallway, including the nurse whisper to someone else how I cried and apologized for not peeing. Another nurse came in to give me more fluids, and she left me a box of tissues. She commented on how sweet my doctor was and how she wanted her 17 year old to have her. I also thanked her for being kind as well. Not all nurses are!
Once my pain was managed and I was able to use the bathroom on my own- yay- I was discharged, and brought out front to my parents in a wheelchair. I thought I would sleep in the car, but I didn’t. I was too impressed with how different I felt. On the way home there was a bright sunset, and my mom said “Look Haley! See! It’s a sign!” I was just happy to have it over with.
The first 2 days were hard, and it was painful to sit up or walk without being hunched over. I was doing ok, but my mom did have a small meltdown she told me. She just felt overwhelmed for me, and badly with how many surgeries I have needed to have, and everything I went through this year. I reminded her this was a good thing. She did say how amazed she was that after my surgery she could see the color come back to my face. I had looked so pale and skinny, and my chin was covered in cystic acne. After my surgery, my skin just started clearing up, I was no longer pale, no longer limping, and life was brought back to my eyes.
The worst incident I had with recovery so far was a cough attack I had after sipping water. My throat was still scratchy from the breathing tube and usually when I cough, it is over and over again until I can stop. I clutched a pillow on my abdomen and applied pressure as I coughed into my arm, eyes watering, yelling “OW” and “FUCK!” I could see my mom wincing as she watched me in pain. Tea helped me a lot more. I learned the hard way that laughing, coughing, sneezing, were all very painful.
When day 3 came, I challenged myself to stop taking my pain medication and only stick to ibuprofen every 6 hours as needed. Day 3 was when I felt my best. I sat upright at our kitchen table and worked on a coloring book. I had purposely bought ones with positive quotes because I had no idea how I was going to be feeling mentally.
I always learn a lesson after a surgery. That lesson is that even when you feel well, you still have to baby yourself because your body is healing from a lot of trauma inside. I find that I try to do a little too much. I stand for full showers, make my own meals, hunch over to grab things. It felt OK at first because I still had medicine in my system. As the days go on I am noticing how very sore and tired my body is. Doing an activity for 15-20 minutes long means I need a 2 hour nap after.
I am not supposed to drive for 2 weeks, but with Christmas Day approaching I am a bit anxious about my plans. Christmas Eve I will have a ride to my great-grandparents, though I am worried about my energy level, and being lazy on the couch elevating my legs. Christmas Day I was invited to my girlfriend Alyson’s family’s house to do a gift swap, but it is an hour away. I am worried about the car ride, and also my energy level. I have FOMO, fear of missing out. I want to be able to do it all but I am realizing that if I want to recover sooner, I need to take the first several weeks easy. My incisions may look small, but I still had a major surgery. I’m still not quite sure what I will do.
Aside from physically, I can tell that this surgery was a new beginning for me. My body and soul are healing in numerous ways, and emotionally I have a lot of healing to catch up on. It is all positive, though it won’t be easy.
I still intend to have a happy holiday. I am excited for Alyson to come home from NYC as I missed her so much. I just need to put less pressure on myself to keep up, and know that in time I will be able to do so many things I was never able to do before. Thanks to this surgery!
December 30th is my post-operative appointment and I am eager to hear my biopsy results. So far all I know is that during my hysterectomy my surgeon also found and removed a bit more endometriosis that had grown back since my last excision in 2019. I feel so refreshed and different now that my uterus is out so I am beyond curious what they will find in the biopsy! I have zero regrets, and I am really proud of myself for advocating for myself again. I know myself, and my body, much better than I think I do.
Thank you all for the patience and the well wishes!! We will see where recovery goes from here.
I had 3 cats at my mom + step-dad John’s house to spoil me
